Urgent Meditation?? 

EPISODE DESCRIPTION:

Have you ever caught yourself rushing when you have absolutely nowhere you need to be?

In this Nudge, I’m sharing the morning I found myself hurrying just so I could relax and meditate. (Yes, I see the irony.)

It got me wondering how often we rush simply because we’ve gotten used to rushing—and whether the pace of our lives might be a little more ours to choose than we think.

Consider this episode your invitation to question the hurry.

TRANSCRIPT:

Welcome to I Used to be Fun, the podcast for women who've looked up from their wildly competent lives and asked, "Where did all the fun go?" Hi, I'm Annmarie Boyle, author, lover of deep conversations, and chronic overthinker, and each week, we get curious about what lights us up and what happens if we stop putting those things last on our to-do list.

But this isn't a design-a-plan life hack kinda show. Here, expect laughter, honest questions, and the reminder that life isn't something to manage, it's something to enjoy. So grab a cup of coffee, settle in, and let's see what we can figure out together.

Welcome back to I Used to Be Fun. So today is a nudge episode, so short and sweet and just me. And the nudge today comes in the form of a question. Here it is: Do you ever feel like you can't slow down? Like the pace of your own life is somehow a little bit out of your own control?

I ask this because at the end of July, Dr. J was away for a week at a conference, and while I always miss him when he's gone, I also revel just a little bit in the fact that for however many days he's away, my schedule is 100% my own. Barring time-specific appointments, I can get up when I want, eat when I want, go to bed when I want, spend an entire evening reading if I want.

Not that Dr. J is ever in any way dictating my schedule, but living with another person requires some amount of compromise, right? You pay attention to what they have going on. You coordinate dinner, maybe. You ask, "What time do we have to leave for that event tonight?" But for this particular week, I didn't have to pay attention to any of those things.

So on the first full day he was gone, I [00:02:00] decided that it was the perfect time to reengage my meditation practice. Meditation is one of those things that I genuinely love and it always makes me feel better when I do it, and yet somehow I still let it fall by the wayside from time to time, which is probably a Nudge episode for another day.

Anyway, I popped out of bed on that first morning motivated and ready to go, and suddenly I'm hurrying to brush my teeth, hurrying to make the bed, moving through the house like I have a train to catch, all so I can, wait for it, relax and meditate.

Anyone else see the irony there? Thankfully, I did, eventually.

I actually stopped mid-stride and laughed at myself because I didn't have any meetings that day. There was nowhere I needed to be. No one was waiting for me. My schedule was mine to determine, and yet I was still telling myself, "Hurry up. [00:03:00] Get this done. Get to the next thing."

And did it make the whole thing doubly ridiculous that the next thing was meditation? Yes. Yes, it did. Eventually, I did stop racing around, and I lit my favorite lavender candle.

Lavender smelling, not lavender colored, in case you were wondering. And I settled into my chair. And immediately, I started thinking about what I had just done. Why had I been in such a hurry?

Was I excited to resume my meditation practice? Yes, I was. But was that the reason I was rushing around like there was a prize for being the first person onto the cushion? No. The answer to that question is something much more ingrained, I think. Like a lot of us, I've gotten used to hurrying. You know, letting thoughts like, "Get this done so you can get to that," and, "Finish that so you can start the next thing," and, "Knock something off your list," drive my days.

And [00:04:00] then I started thinking about how often I do this without even realizing it. Now there are obviously times when we really do need to hurry. I mean, if Jimmy needs to be at the doctor in twelve minutes, and it takes you fifteen minutes to get there, this is probably not the moment to experiment with a more leisurely pace.

I mean, Jimmy needs you to put your shoes on. But how often is there no Jimmy, or even no appointment? How often is there no actual reason that we need to be moving at the speed we're moving? We're just moving that way because that's the way we've conditioned ourselves to move, and that's what struck me most that morning.

Even with no external demands, we tell ourselves and others, "Well, I'd slow down if I could. If work weren't so busy, if the calendar weren't so full, if there weren't so many things that needed doing."

And as previously noted, sometimes hurrying has to happen. But what happens when we actually can slow down [00:05:00] and we don't? That's the part I want us to get curious about.

There's an author and coach I follow who often asks people to "question the premise," and I think that fits here. When you start to hear yourself thinking, "Hurry up.

Get moving," question the premise and ask yourself, "Do I really have to rush right now? Is there actually something requiring me to move this fast?" Or have I just gotten so accustomed to rushing around that it now feels like the normal speed of life? Because, you know, slowing down doesn't have to mean clearing your calendar or suddenly becoming the sort of person who drinks tea while staring thoughtfully out a window.

Usually, like most things, it's much easier than that. Like maybe just brushing your teeth at the speed recommended by dentists or sitting down to eat your Lucky Charms instead of standing at the kitchen counter trying to set the world record for cereal consumption because you've decided you need to get to the coffee shop [00:06:00] immediately.

I mean, nobody wants coffee faster than me, but I also know if it takes me 10 extra minutes, the coffee shop will still be there.

 So that's my nudge for you this week.

The next time you catch yourself rushing about, stop and ask yourself, "Do I actually have to hurry right now?" Likely, the pace of our lives is a little more ours to choose than we think.

Thanks for taking the time to tune in today, and for not laughing too hard when I admitted that I was rushing to meditate. I hope you have a great week. I hope you savor your coffee, stay 10 extra minutes talking to a good friend, or choose to read before tackling the laundry. And if this episode made you laugh or think or recognize a little bit of yourself, I'd love it if you shared it with a friend and subscribed to the podcast.

It's one small way you can help more women find us here. Until next time, take your time with something good.

I Used to Be Fun is hosted by Annmarie Boyle. New episodes drop weekly.

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